Recently I've been guided to listen to this series of lectures by Brene Brown, who is a research professor at the University of Houston Graduate College of Social Work. She also is an author and public speaker. She has spent the last few years researching the topic "Shame" and has come across a common pattern ... The Power of Vulnerability.
As I go through this series, I want to use this blog to personally share some key points from the lectures. My hope is that as I share my personal reflections that it would be a resource and guide for others to seek out self-care in replenishing the soul, spirit, mind and body. As I am taking the time to do that I hope the in-pouring of my own well-being can be an out-pouring of blessings. I am indebted to those who have taken time and resources to invest in my growth and development to be whole.
Brene Brown's series introduction begins with this:
"Today we live in a culture of scarcity a culture of 'never enough.' This scarcity culture of 'never enough' teaches us that we can never have enough success, money, beauty, or power to be safe. The greatest casualties of scarcity culture are our willingness to own our vulnerabilities and our ability to engage with the world from a place of worthiness."
I don't know about you but being vulnerable sounds like a weak thing to do. In fact, because of many negative situations in my life, TRUST does not come easily for me. You see, to trust is to be vulnerable, be open to anything, to allow good and bad to lift you or hurt you. And that was the kind of risk I didn't like to take. For me, when big events happen in my life, whether traumatic and chaotic, I've learned to suppress my emotions and carry-on. I've learned to smile with a heartache. I tell myself, "Don't let the 'enemy' see where you are bleeding, because that's where he'll strike for the kill." Not knowing who I could trust, I did my best to keep the depths of my inner wounds in a locked secured place so that no one can find it. Because if the world knew where I was hurting most, they would take it and sell it to the highest bidder or spread it around like cancer ... yes my fear is that the world would not know how to treat my vulnerabilities to good health but rather kill me with it. Wounds of that magnitude will only decay over time and a heart that once loved effortlessly will become callused. I know this from my own personal experience and sadly through the testimonies of others.
So why do we try so hard to conceal our own vulnerabilities when we already live in a world that is hurting and dying? Why can't we just own our vulnerabilities and be liberated by it? When we are broken why do we pretend that we are whole? I'll tell you this, for me, there was no corner small enough where I could feel safe enough to be vulnerable. Not even the places where I have sought refuge felt safe enough to be broken. This place of worthiness, where does it exist for broken people?
I am still broken, very broken. Where one piece of me becomes whole, another remains broken or partially filled. And although I am made up of broken pieces, my worthiness comes from a place where I am reminded I am unconditionally and dearly loved ... that place is at the cross where Jesus Christ paid it all.
You can check out Brene Brown here:
http://go.ted.com/bvJ3
Up Next: Reflections on The Power of Vulnerability: Why We Struggle
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